Today I did something evil

Mayan date - I don’t know
Star date - 1

You see, I have this roommate who is a total moron slash closet case slash churchgoer slash downright immature bastard. They say mimicry is the best form of flattery but this mofo just took it to the extreme. If I say I like button-down shirts, the next time he goes on vacation and comes back, he has a lot of button-down shirts. When I said purple was the new black, he all of a sudden had a wardrobe of purple clothing. When I said running was the best way to lose weight, he started running. When I started using colored lenses (hazel), he bought a set as well. Funnily right, he doesn’t have an mp3 player to listen to music while he is running, I have a 2nd gen iPod touch with sports kit. He didn’t buy lens fluid so he just started taking mine without asking...

Last week or so he asked to use my iPod and sports kit to use it to go jogging and then afterwards started to brag about the coolness of it, yeah, he is that kind of person. And he steals my lens fluid. So I locked it up in my locker when I left for Havana last Friday. He hadn’t worn the lenses ever since.

But today, stupidity struck me and I left the key in my locker. That was my booboo. So what the bastard did, having the room key at the time, he basically ran towards the room, stole my liquid again and filled his cases with it. I only realized this when he came back into class and looked at me with his fucking big head *yeah he definitely has either hydrocephaly (waterhead) or macrocephaly (bigheadedness)* and blinked like a bitch so I could see his eyes, which had MY COLOR. Bitch, everybody knows its my color, I was the one with the hot lenses.

ANYWAY

So that pissed me off so much, because earlier in the week he already broke my sports kit. I left for Havana and he went into the classroom, took out my ipod, and the sports kit (WHICH HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO USE) and went running with it. This all happened WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. So then, I come back from Havana, unsuspecting. On Monday, which is when I go jogging, I put on my clothes, my shoes, put in the sensor, walk down to the cancha (court), make my play list, and then, when I press start, it starts looking for my sensor, which it never found. So it was broken, I was confused because I had used it just the week before. So guess what I find out, in mid jog, there are 6 entries in my history log on the sports kit software, 6 completely irrelevant entries made that Friday night I was in Havana. So I got so pissed I managed to run 500m more.

And that’s when I scolded the shit out of him later that night. And the bastard has the nerve to deny it. So that just made it worse.

And that is why just now, I went to my room, locked myself in, hid my locker keys again, took his lens case, threw away the liquid in his laundry basket, boiled some water, took a cup, put pepper seeds in it, poured the hot water into it so it could soak up the capsaicin, and then poured that into his lens case. That will teach him. He can’t blame me, because he is the one that stole my liquid

Take that you fat-headed ugly bastard.

And I don’t care who knows.